69 Dudes!

Went to a BBQ yesterday. Guess what? It pissed down. Not actually that uncommon for Manchester - it tends to rain pretty much incessantly all year round. The thing is, Thursday and Friday seemed as though the city had been dug up by some kind of ginormous JCB and transplanted somewhere near the equator. Seriously - on Friday afternoon you could have cooked an egg on the pavement, slapped it between two crusts of bread and been laughing. Saturday? Fucking torrential. I believe that if we all club together and boycott the weather, we can have permanent sun at the weekend. Tsk.

Anyways, I know you didn't come here to listen to me bitch about the weather. You're here for harcore Dreamcast news, reviews and irreverant features, right? For now, the news and irreverent shit is on hold - but, hark, reviews are abundant! Want to read about Vanishing Point?

Click here me auld mucker!

Let it be known that the Editor in Chief of Defunct Games is on his way to E3. Lucky git!
Seriously though, if you are into your DC based drive 'em ups, you should get a copy of Vanishing Point. It 'rocks ass,' or something equally American. There's loads of longevity in it and it's about as close as you can get to The Need For Speed on the Dreamcast. And I ain't talking about those 'bling'-ed up Underground/Most Wanted games on the current consoles. No - they are hideous 'gansta' style offerings that really make me want to projectile vomit all over the shelves in Game (that's Electonic Boutique (I think) for the non-UK based readers). I'm talking about the original 'Road & Track Presents' version on the good old Saturn (or 3DO, but NEVER the PSX). So, yeah - Vanishing Point is top. As an added bonus, it also features one of the best intro movies I've ever seen...all the more reason to buy 700 copies and help to ressurect Acclaim.

As we all know, the internet holds many hidden jewels. Not real jewels, you understand...I mean top little sites. Yesterday I discovered this cool website. It's a PC page called mini-itx.com that features loads of top case mods. You guessed it - there's even a Dreamcast PC case! cast your retinas downwards for the incredible pictures:


Those ker-azy PC modders have also been molesting other Sega systems...LOOK!



In the words of Bill S. Preston Esq (and occasionally Ted Theodore Logan), NO WAY!

Similarly, and with only a little bit to do with the Dreamcast, news has wafted up the U-bend that Uwe Boll, the cretin behind such Hollywood disasters as The House of the Dead and Alone in the Dark, is pencilled in to 'direct' the film versions of both Postal and Far Cry.

Christ. Judging by his aforementioned offerings to the Razzie nominations list, Postal will probably feature Postman Pat, while Far Cry is about a grief sticken widow who lives on top of a mountain miles away from her estranged kids. How so? Because it's clear Mr Boll never even looks at the box of the games he's turning into films, let alone plays them...

While we're talking movies, saw Crash last night. What a great film, exploring the many facets of racism in American society. A truly exceptional film - and it features Thandie Newton, which is ALWAYS a bonus - even if she does have a ridiculous name. Ahem.

Right. Man United just thrashed Charlton Athletic 4-0 in the last game of the season, meaning that we automatically qualify for Europe next season ahead of The Scum (Liverpool); and I've got a date with several bottles of San Miguel Cerveza. "In a bit yo," as Mike Skinner may be overheard to say...

7 comments:

gnome said...

Can't see the point of murdering a perfectly nice Dreamcast and replacing it with something as mundane as a Pentium... Anyway. Glad MU seems to be getting back on track. Who knows, perhaps you'll be mounting a serious championship challenge next season...

Can't stand Chelsea you know. Or Arsenal (even though we used to beat them easier than any other English team, back when we too had a team)

All in all a "Great post" (tm)

Tom Charnock said...

cheers Gnome. Well, at least we finished 2nd! And arsenal in the Champions League Final!!! Hard to believe!

gnome said...

And apparently hard to win... Freak accidents happen only so often. The great democratic powers of Catalonia are taking it back to Barcelona.

Tom Charnock said...

Amen. Funny we're talking about Arsenal when they were once sponsored by Dreamcast. Hmmm...

Anonymous said...

Hey there Thomas. Love the plug for Defunct Games. It's four in the morning (12 noon for you guys) and I just woke up in order to get to my plane (because apparently I'm a lucky git).

Anyway, I just wanted to point out that as an American I have never heard anybody use the phrase "rocks ass." :)

Anyhow, more packing needs to happen before I rush out the door.

gnome said...

That was a major reason for the console's death. So, more reasons to hate them...

Tom Charnock said...

Thanks for the comments Cyril - Defunct Games is a favourite of the 'Yard.