The Great MSR Missing Persons Poster Hunt

Once again, I start this post with an apology. Mere days ago I wrote about the hidden delights in Bizarre Creations' fantastic Dreamcast-exclusive racing game Metropolis Street Racer; but I thought that this new discovery needed its own post. That's because it's never previously been discussed online, and also because I need the help of the community in solving this particular mystery. So, at the risk of this turning into an MSR overload, let's go.

A while back, I was contacted by a member of the Dreamcast Junkyard Facebook group who claimed to have been photographed (along with his brother and a friend) and had his image hidden inside MSR's game world. I have to admit I was skeptical, until this gentleman - known as Grant - offered photographic evidence and an explanation of why he and his sibling were secreted away inside one of the Dreamcast's greatest games. Grant...over to you.

Hi Tom,

The back story is that one of my best mates 'back in the day,' was a guy called Mark Sharratt. He was working for Bizarre Creations and was one of the lead artists for Metropolis Street Racer and even got to travel to San Francisco and Tokyo as part of research for the game. He took photos of my friend, brother and myself and then secretly scanned them into the game, uploading them into the game as 'missing persons' posters, of which two were hidden in San Francisco and one in Tokyo (if I remember correctly). 

As it is with most people, friends move and lose contact over time, so unfortunately I cannot get the exact locations of the posters. I think you would be the first person to point out the missing posters if you did include them in your story, as they have been a secret between friends ever since the game came out all those years ago.

- Grant

Pretty amazing right? This is the first time these missing persons posters have ever been covered online, representing yet another surprise in the storied history of the Dreamcast. They were literally sneaked into the game without Bizarre Creations knowing about them, which is inconceivable in this day and age. These posters have literally remained a secret for 17 years, and they still kind of are...

Some Metropolis Street Racer Details You May Have Missed

Yes, I'm writing another post about Metropolis Street Racer. I simply refuse to apologise for it, and that's because this is a game I adore. The world of MSR just feels so tangible, so credible and so authentic, and not least because Bizarre Creations spent hundreds of hours accurately modelling the three cities in which the vehicular challenges and races take place. However, there's a little bit more to the sterile, simulated reality of Metropolis Street Racer than first meets the eye.

While London's Horse Guard Parade and San Francisco's Fisherman's Wharf may look very close to the real thing as you whizz around in your sports car, if you stop to take a closer look you'll discover some rather interesting - and sometimes suprising - extra details that you may have otherwise missed.

With this in mind, let's buckle up and go for a little joy ride, and investigate some of the finer details you may have overlooked scattered throughout the world of Metropolis Street Racer...

Monaco Grand Prix Online Is Back...Online!

Racing Simulation 2: Monaco Grand Prix Online is a mouthful, and is a title you may not be familiar with. It was a PAL only re-release of the Dreamcast launch title Racing Simulation 2: Monaco Grand Prix, and it allowed - as the name suggests - players to race each other online using the Dreamcast's internet connection. We featured it here at the Junkyard a while back and looked at the way in which it differs from the original version, but now we're revisiting it...because it's back online.

As reported by our good friend Pcwzrd over at Dreamcast Live, Monaco Online (as I'm going to call it from now on because the actual title is ridiculously long) has been resurrected by Shuouma, a programmer far more intelligent than I could ever hope to be. Races can host a maximum of 6 racers at once and there are also online leaderboards just begging to be dominated...but probably not by yours truly. Because I'm shit at games, period.

You'll need a DreamPi to get involved in this whole Monaco Online thing, but you can head over to Dreamcast Live here for the full story, details on how to create or buy a DreamPi and also a handy Dreamcast internet connection guide.

Source: Dreamcast Live

6 Dreamcast Games That Would Perfectly Suit Nintendo Switch

Earlier in 2017 we pulled off a fairly ridiculous April Fools prank that garnered far more attention than we ever intended, or expected. Remember the whole 'DreamStream' thing? It got picked up by a fair few groups on social media and it fooled more people than I'm comfortable admitting, but that's probably just down to my amazing skills of internet tomfoolery. As awesome as it would be to stream Dreamcast games onto a Switch via an internet connection, the very premise is as daft as a brush - that is, why wouldn't Sega just release the games as downloadable ports, as opposed to stream them and require the user to have a WiFi connection? Tsk!

Anyway, this got me thinking. After Damon's rather excellent recent post about Splatoon 2 being the Dreamcast game we never knew we wanted; and after recently purchasing a Switch myself, I started to think about the other jewels in the Dreamcast's library that would make great additions to the Switch's steadily growing software suite. Sega has been a strong supporter of Nintendo hardware ever since the Gamecube and there's been a big enough length of time since the Dreamcast graced us with its presence that there are bound to be millions of Switch owners who have never played many of the system's greatest titles. Surely, with the almost mythical status the Dreamcast has garnered over the past few years, it would be a license to print money for Sega to release - either as budget downloadable games; or as a 'best of' multi-pack - a selection of the finest software ever to grace the little white box of tricks?

With this in mind, here are my picks for the best first party Sega games that would fit right in on the Switch. Please bear in mind that this is just first party stuff, so unfortunately it doesn't include a Switch port of the amazing Spirit of Speed 1937 - a game that was clearly passed down from heaven by the hand of God him/herself (delete as applicable). They'd mostly have to be re-worked with an aspect ratio more in keeping with the Switch screen too, but this is all just wishful thinking in the first place so don't go all keyboard warrior on us. Anyway, here we go...

Sega Dreamcast: Collected Works Hits Kickstarter

We all love a good book, especially if said tome features a glut of previously unseen Dreamcast-related photos, interviews and concept art. It looks like our dreams are about to come true, as journalist Simon Parkin has launched a Kickstarter campaign for just such an item of merchandise - Sega Dreamcast: Collected Works.

Working in collaboration with veteran publisher Read-Only Memory (who previously released the incredible Sega Mega Drive/Genesis: Collected Works), and also Sega, this new Dreamcast-flavoured release looks set to really delve into the history of our favourite console and the finest games to grace the system.

As detailed in the press release, Sega Dreamcast: Collected Works will feature the following:

• Production artwork, design documents and game artwork from pop hits such as Crazy Taxi and Sonic Adventure to arcane curiosities like Space Channel 5 and Segagaga.
• Hardware manufacturing drawings, concept paintings and original photographs.
• An in-depth, interview-led editorial piece by New Yorker writer Simon Parkin. Assembling voices from late 1990s Sega boardrooms around the globe, as well as the game developers who helped to define the platform, this revealing retrospective will chronicle the rise and fall of this lauded videogame console.
• Directory of stand-alone developer interviews and Sega team members including: Masayoshi Kikuchi (Jet Set Radio), Yuji Naka (Sonic Adventure, Phantasy Star Online, ChuChu Rocket!), Naoto Ohshima (Sonic Adventure).

The Kickstarter project at the time of writing has already garnered nearly £60,000 of its £68,000 target (update - it has reached its funding goal with 28 days to go), and naturally we here at the Junkyard have already pledged our support. Quite how different the book will be compared to the soon-to-be-released Dreamcast book from Pix N'Love remains to be seen. However, if you'd like to back Sega Dreamcast: Collected Works on Kickstarter, then follow this link and give generously!

Thanks to Darren Wall at Read-Only Memory for the assets used here, and also to all the other Sega sites for reporting on this while I was away on holiday in Bulgaria with no access to a computer!

DreamPod - Episode 52

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Feel free to join our Facebook group, like our Facebook page and follow us on Twitter; and if you’re feeling flush and/or generous our Patreon is here. Oh, and one last thing - give us an iTunes review if you can be bothered. Cheers!

Related articles to peruse while you're listening to this:

• Review: Ganryu
• Review: Hermes
• Review: 4x4 Jam
• Review: Flashback

Dreamcast Presents Ozzfest 2000: The Official Event Programme

A while back, we featured an eBay auction for a Dreamcast console signed by none other than The Prince of Darkness himself, Mr John Michael Osbourne. You may know him better as Ozzy Osbourne. He's a Brummie musician who was quite famous in the 1970s, apparently. And he got so famous that he even had a music festival named in his honour: Ozzfest.

Back in 2000, Sega sponsored Ozzfest and supplied the eponymous superstar with a bounty of Dreamcasts that could be won by members of the public who competed against various headline acts in Dreamcast-related game challenges. One of these units was offered up for sale recently, although it doesn't appear to have fetched the $995 asking price. Can't think why. It'll take an entire bottle of nail polish remover to get that pen mark off. Tsk.

As you'd imagine, a touring music festival of this magnitude - sponsored by Dreamcast or not - generated a large amount of merchandise, and this post is about such an item: the official Ozzfest 2000 event programme. A gigantic book comprising 45 pages of interviews and band biographies, and made of high quality glossy paper; a book that feels like it is made from the forgotten dreams and weaved wigs of ten thousand 50-year-old men who used to wear skin tight silver trousers but who now wear beige slacks and drive their 12-year-old daughters to school in a Nissan Juke.

Taking place over the summer of 2000, Ozzfest took in numerous locations around the US and featured some of the biggest heavy metal and alt rock bands of the era. And I just happened to stumble across a mint condition copy of the aforementioned programme while browsing eBay...

Review: Ganryu

Ganryu resurrects legendarily unbeaten Japanese warrior Miyamoto Musashi for one final fight. The problem is, in this ugly, lazy, soulless, Frankenstein of game...everyone loses

What hurts most in playing this near-perfectly ported Dreamcast edition of Neo-Geo game Ganryu is that the original creators seemingly just didn't care. They didn't care that they were besmirching and cynically exploiting the name and legendary story of, Genji aside, arguably Japan's greatest historical hero. The bloody life of Miyamoto Musashi and his epic duel-of-duels with Sasaki Kojirō on Ganryū-jima, an island located between Honshū and Kyūshū, is literally the stuff of Japanese legend and here, in this side-scrolling 2D hack-and-slash, it is used as inspiration for what, simply put, is a poor and crassly unimaginative title.

Giant floating doll's head? Coming right up, sir!

A legendary tale

This duel, which has been dramatised many times in film - including in the final movie of an epic three-part series staring famous Japanese actor Toshiro Mifune as Musashi - is often seen as the greatest of Musashi's victories as Kojirō was a lethal swordsman himself, with his deadly use of a nodachi, a Japanese great sword, earning him the title of The Demon of the Western Provinces.

While his deeds have reached mythological proportions, Musashi was very much a real person and one who, arguably, perfected the two-blade fighting style. Musashi's Ni-Ten Ichi Ryu technique (two heavens as one), as detailed in his epic The Book of Five Rings (anyone with an interest in kenjutsu should read a modern a translation), was revolutionary for the time and, no doubt, a large part of how the greatest Japanese swordsman of all remained undefeated in over 60 duels.

The cutscenes are nicely drawn.

Musashi wasn't just the ultimate swordsman either. In his later life he mastered numerous arts and crafts - with arguably the finest being his beautiful broken ink pieces such as Shrike Perched on a Withered Branch. Simply put, Miyamoto Musashi is one of Japan's most well-known and beloved historical figures.

Why then would original creators Visco Corporation - a Japanese software house no less - use him and his most famous adventure as a vehicle to publish what is essentially a shoddy, cheap, bolted together Shinobi clone devoid of all soul?

The answer, of course, is money...

Alice Dreams Tournament OST Available For Pre-Order

Alice Dreams Tournament finally hit the Dreamcast earlier in 2017 and went down pretty well with the community. The frantic, multiplayer focused Bomberman homage also impressed this gamer (read the review here), and overall Julien Desquenne and Nicolas Pochet delivered what they promised with their admirable Kickstarter campaign. One aspect of Alice Dreams Tournament that was especially noteworthy was the music - anyone who has played it will know all about the ear worm tunes that accompany the explosive action.

Thanks to online store and publisher Côté Gamers, a brand new Alice Dreams Tournament OST music CD is coming in October 2017, featuring 27 tracks - two of which are original compositions not found in the main game. Priced at a very reasonable €13/£12/$15, the 'day one' edition of the Alice Dreams Tournament soundtrack is limited and ships with a numbered certificate of authenticity.

You can pre-order the CD from Côté Gamers here (site is in French, so diligent use of a translation tool is encouraged...unless you can read French, of course!), and international buyers can take advantage of the 'books and brochures' shipping option for reduced delivery costs.

Finally, if you haven't had the pleasure of playing Alice Dreams Tournament yet, or didn't back the Kickstarter, you can now buy the game from the Alice Dreams store here.

Tech Demo Video: Taxman's Sonic CD Running On Dreamcast

As Sonic Mania grips the globe, more than a few minds have pondered whether a Dreamcast port would be possible. We even did a stupid video editing the launch trailer to include the Dreamcast logo. No one can imagine that Sega would commission such an enterprise, but the question remains, would it be technically feasible?

How did Namco's lawyers not catch wind of the blatant plagiarism?

Tom reached out to Christian Whitehead, aka 'The Taxman', one of the key persons behind the Retro engine that powers Mania and the recent ports of Sonic 1, 2 and CD to Android and iOS devices. He was optimistic that a DC port would be possible.

And just yesterday, a new post on the Sonic Retro forums provides some videographic evidence of such a feat being achieved. Forum member 'sonicblur' has posted a video of Taxman's 2011 remake of Sonic CD running on real Dreamcast hardware. While this isn't Sonic Mania, it is in the same family of games, running on the same engine, or at least an earlier version of the same engine. While the video shows many glitches and graphical bugs, it is still an impressive technical achievement.

Remember, sonicblur is quick to point out not to make too big a deal about this. He has little time to work on it, so don't expect to be downloading a disc image any time soon. There are also some copyright issues to be wary of, as Sega is still profiteering from the 6 year old game.

So don't get too excited, just sit back and bask in the warm glow of the knowledge that Sega's last little white box is still full of surprises, and in small corners of the globe, talented coders can still produce magic from its rusty, two decade old hardware.

Trickstyle Now Available On ZOOM Platform

Trickstyle refuses to pass into antiquity quietly, it seems. Only recently we were being wowed by the awesome Trickstyle iOS stickers that somehow became a thing (no, seriously - look here). It appears the internet's insatiable thirst for Acclaim's futuristic hover boarding title knows no bounds though, and while it has been available on GOG for a while, the game has now also been added to online retailer ZOOM Platform's library. ZOOM Platform, for those not in the know, is a digital distribution service for PC and Mac games, and its mission is - and I quote - "to design, create, and publish traditional and interactive entertainment with a Generation X trans-media appeal."

Well, Trickstyle certainly has Generation X trans-media appeal, and it has it by the bucket load. Shame about the framerate in the Dreamcast version, but it's all about the Generation X trans-media appeal, so I'm prepared to overlook that. Anyway, Trickstyle is now on ZOOM Platform and as an added bit of Sega-related trivia, ZOOM's executive chairman is none other than Bernie Stolar. Yes, that Bernie Stolar. Cool eh?

Trickstyle for PC and Mac costs $6.99 and you can grab it here if you don't already have it for your lovely Dreamcast.

10 PC Games That Should Have Been Ported To Dreamcast...But Never Were

We've touched on this subject briefly in the not-too-distant past, but I thought it was worth revisiting with a proper article. What am I talking about? Why, PC to Dreamcast ports of course. It's no secret that the Dreamcast was held aloft as some form of chimera, a home gaming console that could host arcade-perfect conversions from the NAOMI cabinets, but also a console that could mimic a decent, medium specced gaming rig of the era.

Thanks to the inclusion of Windows CE elements, the Dreamcast was almost viewed as the perfect system to which PC games could be quickly and easily ported, and for a short time during the console's early life it looked like developers were lining up to complement their computer-based releases with a Dreamcast version as standard procedure. The addition of compatibility with Windows CE is quite an interesting subject in its own right, and as discussed in this CNET article from September 1999 Microsoft was hoping that the inclusion of the operating system would actually be a catalyst for more PC software being brought to the Dreamcast.

"Microsoft's new [Windows CE 2.0] development software may help get game developers back on track in bringing Windows CE-based games to Dreamcast. The toolkit is designed to simplify title development and conversions from other system platforms, Microsoft said. The toolkit also provides improved graphics performance and other multimedia effects.

"The suite provides faster data transfer between the development hardware and the Dreamcast console, while technology borrowed from web page development tools aids in the creation of customized games."

- CNET, September 1999

Granted, before the Dreamcast was even released PC hardware was technically a good deal more capable (Intel had already released a 450Mhz Pentium III processor by mid 1999, for example); but the power of Sega's fledgling system outstripped the contemporary consoles by several degrees of magnitude, and Windows CE compatibility hinted that uncompromised PC ports were set to be a reality for the first time.

"Equipped with a high-powered chip, modem, and other PC features, Sega's Dreamcast - like other gaming machines coming to market - can ostensibly duplicate, and even improve upon, many of the core functions of home PCs."

- CNET, September 1999

Initially this certainly appeared to be the case anyway, not least because of the keyboard and mouse peripherals, and a number of high profile PC games were given a decent crack of the whip on the Dreamcast. Titles like Hidden & Dangerous brought a level of strategy to consoles that hadn't really been seen before, and Speed Devils showed how close the new system could get to emulating high-end PC visuals for a fraction of the price. Later came games like Rainbow Six, Star Lancer, The Nomad Soul, Soldier of Fortune, Stupid Invaders and (to a certain extent) Half-Life - all titles that started life as PC games. Unfortunately, due to a number of factors, the floodgates never really fully opened and the deluge of PC ports failed to materialize.

The brevity of the Dreamcast as a fully supported system is the biggest factor in this, as many PC games that were odds on to have made the leap from the office to the living room were undoubtedly cancelled once the news of the Dreamcast's demise filtered through the industry. The history of the Dreamcast is littered with abandoned and half finished projects, many of which we're seeing come to light many years later.

However, with this post I wanted to explore some of the PC games from that halcyon era where consoles and PCs were pretty much level pegged when it came to graphical grunt; and explore some of the games that were rumoured to be on their way to the Dreamcast, but which never made it. To clarify/confuse things further, some of these games were actually in development for the Dreamcast before being cancelled, while others are simply titles I think would have been a good fit for the system. Let's get it on...

Dreamcast Riding High At Gamescom 2017

The annual Gamescom trade fair in Cologne, Germany is always a hit with developers and publishers of the latest and greatest new games and hardware. All the big guns have been in attendance at the 2017 show, with major players like Nintendo, Sony and Microsoft showing their wares, and the public have been lapping it up. But what's all this got to do with the humble Dreamcast? Well, believe it or not, the Dreamcast has been exceptionally well represented at Gamescom this year, with a glut of upcoming games on display for Sega's old warhorse.

Intrepid Izzy from Senile Team, Retroguru's Hermes, Xenocider from Retro Sumus, the recent releases from JoshProd, Saber Rider and the Star Sheriffs, and Alice Dreams Tournament have all been on display and fully playable. This is due in part to the sizeable displays laid on by Retro Spiel and German retro gaming magazine RETURN. It's pretty awesome to see the Dreamcast represented at such a prestigious event, even more so with all these new titles on display. Below you'll find an assortment of photos from Gamescom 2017 showing that the Dreamcast is far from dead - it's very much alive and kicking!

Cowboy Bebop Homebrew Shmup Coming Soon To Dreamcast

Not going to lie in an attempt to look more learned than I am - I've never seen an episode of Cowboy Bebop. I know that it's an animation and that it's highly regarded...but that's about as far as my knowledge goes. Ask me about branch lines closed by Dr Beeching's infamous restructure of the British rail network in the 1960s instead though, and boy you're in for a treat.

But back to the main point. There's a homebrew shmup heading to the Dreamcast that's based on the Cowboy Bebop franchise and it actually looks pretty decent. Programmed using the BennuGD language, this new shooter from indie developer Rolando Fernandez (aka folken) reminds me a little of Trevor McFur in the Crescent Galaxy in terms of visuals - and I hope that doesn't sound like an insult, as Trevor McFur, for all its shortcomings was a pretty good looking game.

From what I can gather this isn't a totally new game, but instead is an updated version of an existing homebrew, but using BennuGD it'll offer improvements in terms of smoother gameplay and some extra options. That said, I'd never heard of the original either, so this is a moot point. There's not really much more to say for now, but we'll be keeping an eye on this one and will update you when we have more information and/or a release date.

Thanks to our good friends at Sega Saturno for sharing this with us, head over there for the original reveal article in Spanish. Once you've read that, go here and read all about the Beeching Axe, and then leave a comment about your favourite closed branch line and/or station.

New Shenmue III Trailer & Logo Divides Opinion

Yeah, yeah. It's not really related to the Dreamcast anymore but here it is. Shenmue III's latest trailer. Apparently this is showing off some actual in engine footage which is...interesting. I mean, the locations look excellent - lots of lovely lighting effects, shadows and architecture as you'd expect. The music, too is as rousing and spine tingling as it ever has been. However, those character models look a bit basic don't you think? After two years of development time?

Again, these are early renders but the comments on the Shenmue III Kickstarter page show that people are divided not only by Ryo's altered look, but also the new logo. Some of the more negative include this from Phillip Zamora:

"While I can see your going for a somewhat cartoon look, the bad guy's face looks ridiculous & unrealistic for a human being. As well the new Shenmue logo looks less cool or professional than the original handwritten one."

And this from François Mahieu:

"The best decision now would probably be to cancel the project. Please leave us with our memories from the original Shenmue."

Although it's not all bad - far from it in fact - and lots of positive comments echo what Riled Up had to say on the progress thus far:

"The game really looks good. But you need an inteligent mind to see that. You could easily say no facial expression blabla. But that trailer is not intended to show that it is final."

Personally, I couldn't give a flying toss about either as long as it plays well when it lands in my PS4, and going off Yu Suzuki's back catalogue I don't think we have anything to worry about on that front. But what do you think about this new trailer and logo change? Sound off in the comments or in our Facebook group.

Previous Shenmue related posts:

• 7 Year Old Secretly Documents Her Dad Playing Shenmue
• A Quick Look At What's Shenmue
• Shenmue Bomber Jackets Now Available
• DreamPod: Featuring Corey Marshall & Adam Koralik
• Praying In Yamanose
• A Rare Shenmue Prototype Appears!
• Shenmue III Kickstarter Announced

Some Thoughts On Sonic Mania

So Sonic Mania has finally landed, and it's every bit as good as we hoped it would be. The last time I bought a Sonic game for a contemporary console was probably when I got Sonic Adventure 2 for the Dreamcast way back when, and since then I've pretty much given the franchise a bit of a wide berth; the negative press subsequent releases have garnered always putting me off investigating them.

For some weird reason, the post-Adventure 3D games (with the exception of Sonic Generations and - reportedly - Sonic Colours) have been...misguided in their attempts to keep the spiky blue one in the public eye. Or rather, they've kept him in the public eye for all the wrong reasons. But this most definitely isn't a review; and it isn't meant to be one of those 'Sonic is crap' think pieces usually written by games journalists too young to even remember Sonic's first game on the Mega Drive. No, these are my random and meandering thoughts on the awesomeness of Sonic Mania and why it is such an important release for Sega's flagship series.

I remember when Sonic 2 came out and my brother asked for it for his birthday. As we're twins, it was my birthday too. That would have been March 1993, so my 11th birthday. Do you know what I asked for? A toy coach. A fucking coach. A die cast toy coach with luggage compartments that opened and a door that opened and little rubber tires that you could peel off the metal wheels. I still have no idea why I asked for - and got - a toy coach. Meanwhile, my brother had Sonic 2. One of the greatest platform games of all time.

The reason I bring this up is that I vividly remember the differing levels of enjoyment we gleaned from our respective gifts. My coach was all but redundant after a few minutes pushing it around the carpet and smashing it against a wall simulating an horrific road traffic accident. Sonic 2 though...well that cartridge stayed firmly implanted in our Mega Drive for weeks (in between sessions of European Club Soccer), and I still hold the game in the highest regard now, 20-odd years later. Why? because it's a masterclass in platforming and added just enough to the original Sonic template to be considered a completely new, yet wholly familiar experience.

That's kind of how I feel about Sonic Mania. The familiar levels and visual style, and the outrageously good music that harks back to the original 2D side scrollers. It all just reeks of old-skool Sonic yet somehow manages to be brand new, shoehorning in new visual effects and graphics techniques that wouldn't have been possible on the 16-bit system the Sonic series was born on. If you haven't already, I recommend watching Digital Foundry's video on Sonic Mania because it goes into detail on how the game came about and the tricks employed in the visuals that you probably wouldn't notice unless they were pointed out.

Review: Hermes

2017 is fast becoming a bumper year for new Dreamcast releases, and may well take the crown for most productive year for commercially released indie titles since the demise of the platform we all love so much. Not only do we have JoshProd porting classics to the console, Orion bringing us Escape 2042 and several highly anticipated titles on the horizon, but we now also have the second Dreamcast offering from Retroguru (who released the fun puzzler Fruit'Y a couple of years ago) and Dragon Box Shop. Hermes is a little 8/16-bit inspired run and jumper that opened for pre-orders a couple of months ago, and has now been received without much fanfare by those who purchased it.

Hermes sees you play the role of the title character, a French chef who has an almost unhealthy appetite for some grilled chicken. But rather than take a trip down to the nearest supermarket (which wouldn't have made a very good game - let's be honest. Bit short. Still more fun than Spirit of Speed though...); our Gallic hero does what every red-blooded meat eater who values good food would do, and that's slaughter the chicken himself.

If video games have taught me anything, it's that the slaughtering of animals usually involves jumping on platforms, avoiding snails and risking agonising death all in pursuit of the ultimate nutritious goal, and that is exactly what happens in Hermes. The chicken, unsurprisingly not keen on becoming the next gastronomic experience for our eponymous hero, decides to leg it, leading Hermes on a merry dance to chase down what is fast becoming a poorly chosen source of nourishment.