The nights have begun to draw in as we approach the arse-end of the year. The leaves are falling off the trees, everyone's getting a bit more miserable and the temperature is dropping. It's winter...and it happens around the same time every year. Every single year. But yet we always seem a bit surprised when the clocks go forward and the need to pay our electricity bill in a timely manner takes on a whole new meaning. But what if you cannot my friends? What if you cannot afford to pay your electricity bill? What then? Never ending nights of freezing temperatures and darkness?
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| "I think I can see a release date...oh wait - my mistake" |
There is an answer:
Prometheus' gift to us mere mortals. I'm not talking about Promethian Designs' oft promised theft-a-thon
Picassio, either (although that would be nice). No, I'm talking about fire.
Fire! To light your candles and set a roaring inferno in the fireplace, beating back the darkness and the cold like a righteous boot to the face of...a lack of photons. Um.
How to ignite such a fire though? With this wondrous instrument, naturally:
Yes - the Official Sega Dreamcast Zippo! It can be yours right now if you
go here and bid on this eBay auction...which
I swear is not mine*, Google. So don't go removing us from your searches again. Please. Have you lost weight, Google?
That's enough ass kissing.
*Google temporarily removed the Junkyard from search results because they accused us of being a spam site or linking to advertising sites or some such crap. I raised a case and we were reinstated in search results.
